Girlie things 💅 & a lil announcement [Like You Know Whatever]

Hi friends!

How are you? How is 2023 treating you so far? I was going to write about what a cozy lil homebody I’ve been, barely leaving my house, but then I realized, actually, no, that’s not the truth, Ellen. Since we last talked, I’ve been to a boozy birthday brunch, tried a new brewery in my neighborhood, went to a marionette show, and even went out on a MONDAY night when it was RAINING to get pho and see a comedy show (the friend I went with and I kept turning to each other and going, “Look at us. Who ARE we??”).

But I’ve also been staying in and doing face masks and watching movies and making soup (broccoli cheddar 🤤), so, there’s that. You all know I love to travel, but being home with all my stuff really makes me happy, too. I am not a woman who was made to live on limited wardrobe options. I only brought three pairs of shoes on my 10-day vacation to Mexico and that was really hard for me. *sobs lightly*

I have a bit of an announcement today, which is: Like You Know Whatever is now offering paid subscriptions! Let me first be very, VERY clear and let you know that almost nothing will change for free subscribers. Don’t panic! You will still get my normal biweekly posts, the only difference for you is that I’m now putting posts older than two months behind a paywall. That seems pretty reasonable to me.

And I’m going to be offering paid subscribers an additional newsletter each month, starting TODAY! The first one is already up, and it features a Like You Know Whatever bingo card (or a drinking game, if you prefer), and I answer a fun survey I found on someone’s old Xanga! If you’d like to support me and get access to this and any future paid subscriber-only content, you can use this button right here:

It’s $5/month (the lowest Substack will let me charge), or you can buy a whole year in advance and you’ll get a free month. All paid subscriptions start with a free seven-day trial period before you’re charged.

There is also the very fancy option of becoming a Founding Member for those of you who want to support me even further. I would consider that kind of the equivalent of an annual donation. (Maybe we’ll have a gala sometime! Ooh, I know exactly which earrings I’d wear.) The suggested annual price is $75, but you can enter any number greater than 55, and it would be much appreciated. Founding Members get all the same benefits of paid subscribers, plus, I’ll write you a personal haiku as a thanks!

So, basically:

Free subscribers → stay the samePaid subscribers → get +1 newsletter each monthFounding Members → are like fancy donors

I think that’s pretty fair. I know that bringing monetization into something that has been purely free makes people nervous, but I’m trying to do it in the most optional, “huh, that actually makes sense” way I can. I’ll be transparent about why I decided to open up paid subscriptions. I have been writing some form of this newsletter regularly since May 2014, and around this time last year when I checked my stats, 86% of subscribers had been with me since 2016 or earlier. Even accounting for the fact that I have taken a week off here and there, that’s well over 100 newsletters that most of you have gotten for free. My average newsletter these days runs about 2500 words. I am basically giving away a novel a year now in newsletter content. I want to continue to grow Like You Know Whatever and write even more, but it feels ridiculous to do that without at least giving subscribers the option of financially supporting my efforts. I understand that times are tough and not everyone can afford another subscription fee, so please, feel totally welcome to continue on as a free subscriber, I’m happy to have you here! But if you can spare a little coin, it would mean the world to me to have your support.

Please feel free to hit reply and let me know if you have any questions about paid subscriptions or are wondering which one is the best option for you, and I’ll try to respond as quickly as I can!

Alright, enough shop talk. Let’s get into the minutia of my daily life that you all seem to tolerate reading about for some reason.

My husband, Ross, and I had the unluckiest Friday the 13th ever last week. First, our car’s battery died, so I couldn’t go into the office as I’d planned. We got it jumped, and Ross took it to a Pep Boys and left it there while he went to his gym nearby. He got a call from Pep Boys while he was at the gym and thought, “Oh God, they must have immediately found something expensive wrong with it.” Nope! It turns out that someone had BACKED INTO OUR CAR while it was at the Pep Boys!!! Even worse, a staff member was working on it at the time, so this person kind of hit our car into him! He seemed okay, but still! The damage to the car was mostly cosmetic and we got the person’s information, and honestly, these are not the first scratches on our car, and they likely won’t be the last. (Remind me to tell you about the time that I broke the same side view mirror twice in one week.) But still, to have your car hit while it’s getting repaired is pretty unlucky, no? And for the record, 13 is my lucky number! It’s also my only tattoo, on my left wrist, which I got in a Friday the 13th flash sale the day I turned 31.

Next weekend I am going out to the desert to work on ideating a new writing project and finishing up some old ones. I wasn’t planning on traveling again so soon after our holidays in Mexico, but in talking to a few people about where I’m at with writing right now, I realized that I really need to give myself the time and space to work on a big chunk of writing without any distractions. It is obviously a huge privilege to be able to do that, and I’m super grateful that my life and finances allow for it. Even then, it’s something that I can only do about once a year. I’ve found that I need to be at least 90 minutes away from home in order to really focus and get things done. One time, I rented a guesthouse in Laurel Canyon that was only about a twenty minute drive from my apartment at the time, and I ended up rushing through my work and going home early because I missed my husband and my cat. I don’t do that if there’s a two hour plus drive ahead of me.

I’m excited to start something new. I think that that is my favorite part of the whole process, brainstorming and dreaming up an entirely new thing. I love the freedom I feel at the beginning of a project, that it could be anything, as opposed to once you start giving it structure and it has to fit into a certain shape. So much of the process is tugging and squishing it into that shape. Then, at the end, you have something that is vaguely shaped like your original idea, but is actually a totally different thing. It’s beautiful and frustrating at the same time.

Let’s get into Some Recs:

- If you haven’t yet checked out my Google doc full of Mexico recs, I encourage you to do so! It will probably make you want to plan a trip to Mexico City and Oaxaca, to which I say, well, yeah, why the hell not?

- Often, when my husband is driving us somewhere, he’ll put on a podcast (sometimes he’ll proceed to start a conversation with me and talk over it, which drives me insane!!! But we love Ross, don’t we?). Usually it’s Doughboys, but sometimes, it’s a podcast from a former Doughboys guest. The other day, he put on the “Aging” episode of Jon Gabrus’s podcast High and Mighty while we were driving across town to visit a friend, and I have to say, it’s been a long time since I’ve related to something so deeply. Fellow millennials, childfree adults, and anyone who lives in a big city far away from their parents and has had them visit would probably feel that one.

- Here’s an update on the #100bestmoviesofalltime challenge that Ross and I have endeavored to take on this year! Since I last wrote to you, we’ve watched the following: 

• 8 ½ – One of my absolute favorites, he’d never seen it before, but to my surprise, he liked it! I think I freaked him out by crying at the ending, though. Me: “It’s just so beautiful, it’s all the people in his life coming together and he says, ‘life is a celebration, let’s live it together.’” Him: 👁👄👁 When we were planning our wedding, I originally wanted to walk down to the aisle to the Nino Rota score, but Ross said it was too pretentious, which was probably right! I ended up walking to the Pixies’ “Where Is My Mind?” played by my dear friend on piano, and now every bad cover of that song I hear, I get to think about my favorite day.

• 2001: A Space Odyssey – Ross had seen this one, but it was new for me. I feel like I had a pretty decent film history education in college – I was a film major and never missed a screening (even if I was sometimes st*ned for them), and I often watched additional films on my own from directors or periods I was interested in. But still, some truly iconic films have slipped through the cracks, and it’s a pleasure to get to catch up now. Kubrick is one of those directors who seemed like a brilliant asshole. He was Lynchian before Lynch. I can’t decide if I hated the ending of this, or I just didn’t understand it.

• The Godfather – Ross hadn’t seen this ever, and I hadn’t seen it since high school, before all that film education I just told you about. I made my go-to pasta lately, which is bucatini with Italian sausage and a sauce made out of fresh grape tomatoes, and we had us a real dinner-and-a-movie night last Saturday while it was pouring outside. I just love this movie. Of course, the story is very compelling, the writing is great, but I was struck for the first time how beautiful the visuals are in this movie. I want to go to a wedding as big and loud and fabulous as Don Corleone’s daughter’s in the beginning.

- So, a couple newsletters ago I shared my resolutions for 2023, but since then, I have also made some beauty resolutions in addition to my regular ones. I thought I’d share them with you now:

1. Figure out how to maximize my hair looking “done” while minimizing the amount of time I have to spend doing it (this may simply be an impossible equation, and I’m willing to accept that)

2. Focus more on skincare and actually wash my face and use my products before bed, don’t just use a makeup removing wipe and call it a day

3. Shop my stash–use more of the makeup I already own

4. If I do buy new eyeshadows, stick to singles and smaller palettes, like quads and quints. No humongo ColourPop palettes, for example

If anyone has advice on #1, please, PLEASE let me know! I usually air dry my hair with no product in it because I can’t be bothered and I like the natural waves it has, but I am willing to spend slightly more time on it if it will greatly improve how it looks. I bought one of those Revlon One-Step drying brushes, but it’s heavy as fuck, and so far it takes me just as long to use that as it does to dry my hair with a regular hairdryer, with virtually the same results. Now I’m thinking about exploring hot rollers? Or maybe I should get a Beachwaver? Or do I really have to drop $500+ on a Dyson package? I dunno, dude. Help!!!

- Can I just say though, I am genuinely so happy to be back home with all my skincare products after traveling with only the few items that could pass through a TSA screening. In Mexico, I was out in the sun for hours every day and washing my face with BAR SOAP (and washing my hair with 2-in-1 shampoo/conditioner–can you imagine??). Suffice it to say, my skin was not happy with me, and it took some reasoning with it once I got home to get it back to a good place.

It’s interesting to me that “skin cycling” became the big beauty buzzword of 2022, because that’s how I’ve always handled my skincare routine. If I exfoliate one day, I focus on hydration the next. If I use a lot of products one day, the next day, I’ll give my skin a rest and stick to calming essentials. I just thought that was how you were supposed to do skincare? You’re telling me that some people do the same shit to their skin every single day? It’s a living organ, man, you have to adapt to its needs.

One product that has really helped my skin chill the fuck out is Tower 28’s SOS Daily Rescue Facial Spray. I’ve been using it as a toner and it has been very soothing and calming. I think it would work for almost any skin type. In the past year, I’ve noticed a lot of redness creeping into my cheeks, and I think this mist has been helping that, too. I’m somewhat ambivalent about facial sprays–I hated the Pleasing mist I tried over the summer, but I love my Herbivore toner, although it’s pricey. One thing I like so much about the Tower 28 spray is that it comes out in a large spray of fine mist, so you can really feel that you’re getting product on your face.

Another product I’ve been loving lately is the Paula’s Choice BHA Liquid Exfoliant. Fellow skincare addicts have probably had this product recommended to them a thousand times. Well, it really is that good. I’ve tried a BHA-based liquid exfoliant in the past, the CosRx one, and it did absolutely nothing for me, so I was skeptical. The Paula’s Choice stuff is gentle, yet very effective. It’s cleared out and shrunk my pores, and I believe it’s even making a difference in some of my texture issues. She really is That Bitch. I use her 2-3x a week and usually pair her with the First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Cream, which I use when I need doesn’t-fuck-around moisturizer.

- I got really into makeup last year, and I think part of the reason was that I was struggling with my feelings about my body, and makeup always fits. Also, it’s just fucking fun, and there are so many great brands and products on the market right now, from drugstore to really high-end stuff, tiny new indie brands to giant old standbys.

Honestly, I wish I had reason to glam it up more often, but I work in comedy, where jeans and a hoodie are basically the uniform. I wear makeup to the office, but the only color I wear on my face most days is a little blush. I don’t do lip color or eyeshadow. Once in a while I’ll wear blue eyeliner (I know, she’s WILD!!). But eyeshadow and lip color is mostly for the weekends, for me. Anyhoo, let’s get into some recent products I’ve tried and loved:

• I only brought two small palettes with me on my trip to Mexico, which I considered very restrained, considering that we were going to be there over Christmas AND New Year’s. One of those palettes was Dominique Cosmetics’ Unconditional Palette, which I randomly got in a BoxyCharm box, and OMG, I’m obsessed!!! (The other palette was a new one that honestly had very poor pigmentation, but I don’t want to poop on them because it’s from a smaller brand and you probably won’t run across it anyway). These Dominique shadows apply LIKE BUTTAH, even the glitter one! I wore it on New Year’s Eve, and yeah, there was fallout, but I would expect as much from a glitter shadow that I applied without using glitter glue or even eyeshadow primer (wtf was I thinking? I think I’d already had some rosé when I was doing my face). The colors all work together so well, too. I am getting more into these smaller palettes that are kind of paint-by-numbers-y as far as building a look, and this palette is a prime example. SO worth the $28! Honestly a steal!

• Speaking of smaller palettes, I have really had to restrain myself from buying pretty much all of the Viseart “Petits Fours” quads after I was introduced to them by one of my favorite beauty YouTubers, Lauren Mae (she should have WAY more subscribers than she does!). They’re not that cheap considering that you only get four shadows a piece ($25), but man, are they lovely. I HAD to get the super special “Violetta” quad and the “Lavande,” the latter because I read in a women’s mag at a formative age that purple eyeshadow makes brown eyes pop. Does it really? Who knows, but these things imprint on you, and at any rate, the shadows are beautiful. I was really happy with the quality–the shimmers and duochromes pop and sparkle the way you want them to, while the mattes are softer and very easy to work with. I can definitely see myself buying more of these this year.

• Like so many other people who watched the Netflix series Wednesday, I became obsessed with the titular character’s lip color. Apparently her whole look is part of the “soft goth” trend that’s very hot right now, and, in my opinion, can be very ambiguous. We all know what goth makeup is: white face makeup and dark everything else, but soft goth could be a smidge of gray eyeshadow and a nude lip. Like…? How are we supposed to KNOW??I read an interview with Jenna Ortega’s makeup artist on Wednesday who said how she created her sheered out burgundy lip: MAC lip pencil in “Nightmoth” mixed with clear lip balm. I guess I wasn’t the only one interested, because I had to wait a few weeks for “Nightmoth” to come back into stock, but once it did, I finally tried it out. I love the color–”Nightmoth” is slightly terrifyingly dark as a pencil, but once mixed with lip balm it becomes a warm black cherry color–but I hate the lack of staying power it has. The thing about lip balm is that it absorbs into your skin and it’s super transferable, so you have to constantly reapply. I’m also someone who is always sipping water or some other beverage, so I tend to gravitate toward more long-wear lip products. I’m glad I tried it, but I see more experimentation in my future to achieve the perfect soft goth lewk.

Alright, that’s enough outta me this week!

Don’t forget to like, comment, and share this newsletter if you’d care to–you can use the buttons at the bottom or the top. Or upgrade to paid if you’d like! There’s a special button just for you at the end of this newsletter.

Until next time—I’ll be over here, “skin cycling.”

Love,

Liz

XOXO